i always pretend to be happy but i know that 2012 is not going to be a good year for me 




did i tell u guys that 
i hate my face
i hate my body
i hate my life
i hate the fact that 
a guy
keeps making me believe that im not good enough
for anyone
i cant believe that stupid teenage infatuation
is making such a big impact on me
what about other people in this world
who have bigger problems
like taking care of their broken family
like fighting to be alive everyday in a war-torn country 
like being bullied at school and having no friends
like having a sexually abusive dad
like.. being made to work in a factory and paid like,50 cents per day
.....and here i am worrying about a PETTY boy




i am a pathetic shallow human being




its really hurtful you know 
it really really hurts


pls god, take away this pain
or open his heart
or just kill him




ok i take that back the killing him part